We’ve missed you.
For the previous few months, we’ve been dreaming about new methods to reconnect—not simply to present you trend information and elegance inspo (you realize we’ve obtained you there), however to open up area for deeper conversations that influence our neighborhood each single day.
As a result of let’s be actual: being plus measurement on this world is extra than simply what we put on. It’s how we’re handled, how we feature ourselves. How a lot are we pressured to carry?
That’s why we launched TCF Talks—a month-to-month stay dialog collection designed to carry area for the actual, uncooked, unfiltered truths about residing in a plus measurement physique. And we knew we needed to begin with the dialog that’s been effervescent beneath the floor for much too lengthy: our psychological well being. It was additionally an enormous motivator for including extra plus measurement wellness content material to the location!
Do you know?
- Analysis reveals that higher-weight individuals are extra prone to expertise melancholy, nervousness, and social isolation—not due to their weight, however due to weight stigma and discrimination.
- Plus measurement ladies, specifically, report twice the degrees of office burnout in comparison with their straight-size friends as a consequence of added pressures to “show” themselves and navigate bias.
- And throughout the board, fatigue and stress-related sickness disproportionately have an effect on marginalized our bodies who’re continuously requested to “be resilient” simply to exist.
We couldn’t consider a greater place to start than with a collective check-in.
So on July thirtieth, we gathered the neighborhood, introduced collectively an unimaginable panel, and pulled the curtain again on the parable of countless resilience.
And hear—what occurred subsequent? Whewwww, the room was on fireplace.
From psychological exhaustion to emotional labor to what relaxation really seems to be like in a plus-size physique, our panel delivered honesty, softness, and ✨very mandatory warmth✨.
In case you missed it (👀 why tho?), listed below are 10 real-deal takeaways from our very first episode:
“I’m Bored with Being Resilient: Fatigue, Burnout, and the Plus-Measurement Lady.”
Our High 10 Takeaways from our debut TCF Talks:
1. Resilience isn’t a persona trait. It’s a survival mechanism.
“We study resilience as a result of the world doesn’t provide us softness. It’s not energy—it’s survival.”
— Marie Denee
Our moderator and founder @MarieDenee set the tone: Resilience could look noble, however for many people, it’s what we had been pressured to construct as a result of nothing else was handed to us.
2. Burnout doesn’t at all times seem like breakdown. Generally it’s simply… silence.
“Generally burnout is your physique whispering, ‘Please cease’—earlier than it screams.”
— Dr. Rachel Millner
Dr. Millner broke down how power burnout in marginalized our bodies typically hides beneath “functioning.” In case you’re exhibiting up however numb? Yeah, that’s burnout too.
3. Disabled, fats, and femme? The stress is tripled.
“Folks don’t need to see disabled fats pleasure. They need gratitude, apology, or hustle.”
— Carmina Suzanne
Carmina introduced receipts, rage, and uncooked fact to the convo—particularly on how the business commodifies incapacity whereas erasing the actual wants behind it.
4. Large & Tall doesn’t imply emotionally bulletproof.
“I can rock a swimsuit on IG, however nonetheless really feel like I can’t breathe inside it.”
— Nick Darden
Nick introduced an often-missing male voice to the desk—and reminded us that plus-size males additionally carry silent stress, particularly when vulnerability isn’t “manly.”
5. You may’t relaxation your means out of systemic hurt—however you can reclaim your power.
“Relaxation isn’t a repair. It’s a combat. It’s saying: I’m not letting the system use me up at present.”
— Phaith Montoya
Phaith mentioned what wanted to be mentioned. Relaxation isn’t only a tub bomb and a nap. It’s political, highly effective, and required.
6. “No” is a full sentence.
Boundaries got here up repeatedly. Whether or not it’s declining a Zoom, ignoring food regimen discuss, or refusing to shrink (emotionally or bodily), “no” could be your strongest wellness instrument.
7. Your softness will not be a legal responsibility.
Marie mentioned it finest:
“I need to be seen in my softness, not simply my energy.”
Sufficient with the Sturdy Black Lady trope. Sufficient with being everybody’s emotional pack mule. You deserve softness with out proving something.
8. You may’t heal in the identical techniques that harmed you.
Healthcare, trend, office tradition—we named names. And extra importantly, we named the price of attempting to heal whereas nonetheless being unseen or dehumanized.
9. Actual relaxation feels boring at first. That’s how you realize it’s working.
Not performative relaxation. Not aesthetic relaxation. Simply… stillness. Discomfort. Unlearning. A second to sit down with your self with out fixing something.
10. You’re not alone. And also you’re not dramatic.
Each head nod. Each “YESS.” Each “that’s me” within the chat.
That was neighborhood. That was validation.
And that’s why TCF Talks exists.
Need in subsequent time?
This primary episode of TCF Talks was a reminder of why we’re doing this. We began this collection to reconnect with you—our neighborhood, our individuals—and to have the conversations that don’t get sufficient area in trend or life-style media.
We opened with psychological well being as a result of, in truth, earlier than we will discuss fashion, success, or visibility, we have now to speak about how we’re actually doing. The reality is, because the examine on weight stigma and psychological well being reveals, residing in a plus measurement physique in a world that wasn’t constructed for us takes a toll—on our minds, our our bodies, and our power.
And judging by the chat, the DMs, and the whew, sure that’s me! moments throughout this discuss, you felt that too.
This was only the start. We’re doing these TCF Talks each month—bringing in daring voices, opening actual conversations, and holding area for us.
Subsequent month’s subject:
“Pretend Title Placeholder: Why Plus-Measurement Vogue Nonetheless Can’t Get it Collectively” (and sure, we’d simply preserve that title as a result of… info).
Right here’s the best way to keep related:
- Be part of our e mail listing so that you by no means miss a stay convo (and catch replays!)
- Observe us on social @thecurvyfashionista—we’ll preserve the dialog going between episodes.
- Convey a good friend subsequent time. These talks hit otherwise after we present up collectively.
As a result of we’re not holding again right here—we’re simply holding area. And there’s at all times a seat saved for you.
See you on the subsequent one.
