In a world saturated with sound and scrolling, Nastiya Kai emerges like a lightning strike—arresting, unpredictable, and unattainable to look away from. Born in Moscow and now floating between LA, NYC, and Paris, Nastiya is constructing a cinematic universe from scratch. Her sound is a visceral mix of experimental pop, glitchy textures, and velvet-laced vocals, pulsing with uncooked emotion and unapologetic vulnerability. With a background in style and a historical past of utilizing private ache as inventive gasoline, she’s carved a lane that doesn’t simply bend style—it obliterates it.
Her new single, “Goodbye,” is an emotional whirlwind that captures the dizzying duality of affection as each an escape and a entice. Written throughout a turbulent stretch in Paris, “Goodbye” blends ambient calm with lyrical chaos. The monitor dives headfirst into that breathless area between wanting to remain and needing to run, capturing the second the place grief meets freedom. As Nastiya herself says, it’s about the whole lot and nothing all of sudden.
Completely self-taught and fiercely unbiased, Nastiya Kai has develop into her personal muse, producer, and prophet. She lets the mess present. She lets the sentiments flood. And in doing so, she offers listeners permission to really feel deeply, too. From battling self-doubt in isolation to studying to belief the noise in her head, Nastiya’s journey has by no means been about perfection—it’s been about transformation. So, whether or not you’re a longtime fan or simply tuning in, one factor is for certain: you’re not simply listening to her music; you’re getting into her psyche. Curious to listen to extra about how she turns emotional chaos into cinematic soundscapes? Properly, excellent news—you don’t need to say goodbye simply but. Take pleasure in our dialog with Nastiya Kai:
What impressed you to jot down “Goodbye,” and the way does it replicate your private experiences with letting go?
“Goodbye” got here collectively throughout Paris Trend Week, after I was purported to be targeted, working, and have it collectively. However the second I landed, one thing very private occurred. Paris is already a really emotionally charged place for me. I lived there for 2 years, and whereas I’ve plenty of stunning reminiscences and other people there, there’s additionally some darkness to it. So, being again at all times comes with this unusual mixture of consolation and unhappiness.
I used to be within the strategy of ending “newnew.wav” on the time and was overwhelmed with work, and that document was not channeling the vitality I used to be feeling within the second, so I began engaged on “Goodbye”. It got here collectively in a number of days, which is how my favourite songs are born—very quick, very instinctive, earlier than I’ve time to second-guess. It additionally grew to become the beat I’d take heed to on my manner again dwelling each day, it made me really feel at peace. The unique title was “Nevesoma,” which is Russian for “weightless,” and that’s what I used to be making an attempt to discover.
That feeling of floating but additionally falling. Of respiratory freely, but additionally gasping for air. The way in which love can really feel like that, too.
The airport imagery got here naturally after that. The motion and the thought of leaving. For me, airports are emotionally loaded areas. I transfer round rather a lot, and every time I do, I at all times say goodbye to somebody on the airport, which is nothing however unhappiness to me.
“Goodbye” is rather a lot about how I really feel about most issues. It’s about nothing and the whole lot on the similar time.
Are you able to describe the emotional journey you went by way of whereas creating the one? How did it make it easier to navigate your personal emotions and address them?
On the time I began engaged on “Goodbye,” plenty of issues had been taking place round me. Life was type of testing me. Previous reminiscences had been coming again, obstacles popping up all over the place, it was a complicated time.
I wrote the beat earlier than the lyrics, and I bear in mind it instantly felt like a lullaby. I’d take heed to it on the best way dwelling, and it will calm me down. It form of grew to become my secure place. That’s how writing typically works for me. I typically don’t know what I’m making an attempt to say till it’s completed. I don’t overthink it until I’m on a deadline.
With “Goodbye,” as soon as the lyrics had been accomplished, I appeared on the tune and thought, “Oh.” I found one thing new about myself. Nearly a brand new a part of me. I knew I used to be carrying plenty of ache and trauma round, however now heaviness, and I’m unsure the best way to put this into phrases, however this turned out to be a wholly completely different emotion. Lots of issues all of the sudden made sense.
The emotional duality of suffocation and intoxication in a relationship is one thing many listeners may relate to. What message or emotion do you hope lingers most after somebody hears the monitor?
For years, I didn’t enable myself to really feel. I shut all of it down, and actually, that ruined me. I obtained so used to surviving that I forgot what it meant to really connect with myself. So now, with the whole lot I do, I wish to assist folks really feel.
I would like them to permit the emotion to radiate by way of their physique, no matter that appears like. Crying within the lavatory together with your mascara all over the place, screaming, throwing your cellphone at a wall, laughing like a maniac, being indignant, being impolite—no matter it’s. We’re human. It’s okay. You don’t have to remain composed on a regular basis.
We’re informed to maintain the whole lot inside, to be well mannered and polished, however that’s not actual. That’s not therapeutic. For me, music is the one place the place I let all of it out. I enable myself to bleed on command, so different folks can lastly really feel one thing they’ve been holding in.
That’s what I would like “Goodbye,” and all my music, to carry area and remind folks it’s okay to really feel the whole lot. Even when it’s messy. Even when it hurts. Particularly when it hurts. You don’t need to run from it.
With the discharge of your EP “newnew.wav,” how do you’re feeling your sound has developed out of your earlier work within the “Demon Period”?
Demon Period was me simply beginning out. I knew nothing about music or the trade; I used to be simply experimenting. Earlier than that, I had a number of songs I made for enjoyable, however Demon Period was the primary physique of labor I took critically. I at all times stated my first mission can be a memoir, and that’s what it was. Each tune was about one thing from my previous—issues I had skilled, folks I wanted to let go of, feelings I hadn’t processed. I wrote all of it, launched it, and by no means appeared again. It helped me shut that chapter of my life.
To be trustworthy, I’m very exhausting on myself; I wouldn’t name Demon Period an ideal mission. However I’m happy with it as a result of it was actual. Simply me and my buddy, locked in a basement, making an attempt issues, studying on the go. That mission ended with one of many worst depressive episodes of my life. However what adopted was one of the best summer time of my life. That distinction, going from full darkness to gentle, was what gave delivery to newnew.wav.
newnew.wav is totally completely different. It’s not in regards to the previous anymore. It’s about me residing within the current, determining who I’m musically. It grew to become a bridge to my subsequent chapter. By means of that, I taught myself the best way to produce, the best way to storytell by way of music, and the best way to belief my concepts. It wasn’t meant to be a success or to please anybody. It was made for me, with love. It carries tales, and it carries pleasure.
And now, with “Goodbye,” I really feel like I’m getting into one thing new once more. I’m now not hiding behind my pc. I’m prepared to indicate my face, to step into the world as a full artist, not simply as a producer or somebody working within the background. newnew.wav helped me construct that confidence. It taught me who I’m.
As a self-taught artist, what had been a number of the greatest challenges you confronted in growing your distinctive sound and elegance?
Nobody tells you ways loud self-doubt might be when there’s nobody validating your instincts. I needed to unlearn the concept perfection is the purpose. The largest hurdle was studying to belief my style, my flawed notes, my bizarre textures, and my unpolished takes. That’s the place the good things lives anyway.
I’ve two very completely different folks residing inside me. Certainly one of them believes perfection doesn’t exist and genuinely loves issues which might be messy, uncooked, and actual. I like myself extra after I’m imperfect and bizarre. However then there’s the perfectionist in me residing by a hyper-structured schedule, planning the whole lot to the second, and wanting full management over the whole lot.
These two variations of me are at all times pulling at one another, and duality exhibits up in my course of. I’ll write one thing experimental and imperfect and adore it. However then I’ll come again to it a number of days later and begin second-guessing the whole lot. I’ll discover each flaw. I’ll fear that individuals received’t perceive it, or worse, that they’ll query whether or not I even know what I’m doing.
The toughest half will not be growing your sound however staying on monitor. Retaining tunnel imaginative and prescient in a actuality that’s continually making an attempt to distract you or make you second-guess your self. Particularly with social media, the place folks wish to give recommendation you didn’t ask for.
So for me, the true problem isn’t discovering a singular sound, it’s trusting it.
You’ve been open about your expertise with borderline persona dysfunction. How does that emotional panorama inform your music with out defining it?
Residing with BPD means I really feel the whole lot in all caps. It’s exhausting, and in addition the rationale my songs really feel like temper swings with beats. However I’m not a analysis in eyeliner; I’m an individual who makes use of music to metabolize depth. I don’t wish to be romanticized or pitied; I simply wish to make honesty sound stunning.
Residing with BPD gave me plenty of tales. Particularly from my youthful years, earlier than I began remedy or understood my analysis. So I’ve rather a lot to jot down about. But it surely additionally made me very interested by myself. I studied Psychology in college, and although I don’t wish to pursue this professionally, I typically actually really feel like my very own experiment. Like, I wish to see how deep I can go into my mind.
That exhibits up in my songwriting. Generally I keep on the floor, and the tune is extra in regards to the feeling within the second. However different occasions, I am going deep. And after I do, it’s like, wow… okay, that was intense. It’s not at all times deliberate. It simply occurs. But it surely teaches me one thing each time.
Additionally, BPD is an emotional rollercoaster. It’s like driving a wave, typically a number of waves directly, and that’s additionally what music is to me. It strikes quick, it’s unpredictable. So in that sense, the expertise of BPD and the method of creating music are very related.
You appear to blur the road between persona and private. How do you defend your inside world whereas nonetheless sharing a lot of it?
I used to overshare on a regular basis, particularly on social media. It felt pure. I didn’t suppose twice about it, and actually, for years, I used to be okay with that. However at one level, that modified. I grew to become happier, extra grounded, and I began experiencing life extra quietly. That’s after I realized I didn’t wish to share the whole lot anymore.
There are issues in my life now that really feel too sacred to provide away. And for some time, I assumed I owed folks entry to the whole lot, that I needed to present the attractive components, to not exhibit, however simply because I wished to share the nice. However recently, I’ve felt this want to only be blissful in non-public.
Additionally, this may sound foolish, however sharing takes time. Being in your cellphone takes time. And I began noticing I didn’t wish to spend that point anymore. I wish to really feel the solar on my pores and skin. I wish to hear when folks converse, not simply hear them. I wish to make actual reminiscences, not simply seize them.
I nonetheless share by way of my music. That’s the place the whole lot goes now. All of the tales, the sentiments, the emotional waves I don’t publish anymore—they’re within the songs. That feels extra stunning to me. As a substitute of giving folks updates each day, I give them one piece of artwork that holds the whole lot. One tune carries the entire story. And that feels extra trustworthy.
Are there any artists or genres which have notably influenced your work on “newnew.wav” or your upcoming single?
With newnew.wav, there weren’t plenty of exterior influences, actually. That mission was very experimental for me. I constructed it from voice notes, discipline recordings, and random objects, like jars, pens, water bottles, even timber and frogs. I used to be sampling birds in forests, recording sounds in nature, and simply seeing what I might make out of textures as an alternative of genres. It wasn’t about recreating one thing I’d heard, it was about taking part in, exploring, and telling a narrative from scratch.
For “Goodbye” and the newer work, it’s type of the identical. I don’t sit all the way down to make music with references in thoughts. I by no means suppose, Oh, let me attempt to do one thing like this artist or that sound. That’s simply not how my course of works. I often create in my little bubble, and no matter comes out is simply… what comes out.
That stated, I’m certain my mind shops issues with out telling me. Recently, I’ve been listening to plenty of Grimes and Yung Lean, particularly since he simply dropped a brand new album. I grew up listening to him, so it’s been nostalgic. However none of it immediately formed the music. If something, these influences present up later, as soon as the work is already accomplished.
Photographs / Diana Amefolle
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